Kaytee Jones

You’re everywhere except where you should be.

Everywhere in sight, nowhere I can touch.

In everything I do, and yet I can’t hug you.

It’s hard to reflect on the whole year that has passed without a single second of his smile, his touch or his voice.

That’s what comes to mind when I try and think about how my year has gone the way everyone else is right now.

I could share the smiles, I could share the tears, I could create a collage of both but tbh it’s just once again unbearable to be going into a year without him.

I don’t feel proud of ‘making it’ without him, it doesn’t feel like an achievement. I feel guilty.

But as someone still surviving this hell on earth, I want to share for anyone else with this painful future that this year gave me a glimmer of hope that there’s some potential to pass this life by with some enjoyment, which at the beginning of the year would have been unbelievable.

If I’m going to celebrate anything, it can only be that I’m another year closer to seeing you again 💔