Hope in a High Risk Pregnancy

This is what CHD looks like. It’s a life of cardiology appointments. It’s becoming a pro with EKGs by the age of 5. It’s a longer duration between appointments, but the pre-appointment anxiety remains. It’s a lifetime of celebrating the little moments because you remember those dark days where life as you know it today just didn’t seem possible.
❤️💙❤️‍🩹

Sending my love to all my fellow CHD mamas. Reach out if you’d like to join our virtual community chat this week. Regardless of where you are in your journey, you are welcome to join us! There is strength in knowing you’re not alone.

February 7-14th is CHD Awareness Week. Thank you Congressman for recognizing this very important week. We’re so grateful for your continued support!

In the CHD community, this week is all about spreading awareness. For us, it’s about sharing our story so future families know how much hope there is despite a CHD diagnosis. It’s about making sure everyone knows this is the number one birth defect, and prenatal/newborn detection is critical. It’s about getting OBs & PCPs to understand the course of treatment, and help patients receive the correct specialist for continued care. It’s about helping families realize they’re not alone, and there’s a community ready to support them.

CHD is Hayden’s diagnosis, but it’s changed our family forever. It’s helped us understand what truly matters, taught us how to fiercely advocate for our son, and drives us to bring hope where it felt none existed for us. Hayden will forever be followed by a cardiologist to keep tabs on his heart, but we consider ourselves so fortunate to have the best team on his side that gives us the opportunity to grow, learn, and thrive alongside him.

It’s time for a rebrand! Officially launching as where my mission is to provide support for CHD families as they navigate the emotional journey of .

I started this Instagram account in 2021, two years after I navigated my own high-risk pregnancy due to my son’s prenatal CHD diagnosis. My goal was to support other pregnant women in their own high-risk pregnancies, but truth be told the energy just wasn’t there. At the same time, I served as a board member of CHD nonprofits, and really felt connected to the purpose. When that time ended earlier this year, I felt there was a major gap in providing emotional support for the families, and I started to dig in. I’ve been compiling all of my lessons learned in our own CHD journey and in my conversations with other I realized that there are so many who could benefit from them. I’m so excited to announce that I’ve organized my lessons learned into a free resource guide, and I’m currently in progress with a CHD course focusing on the emotional support - everything from tips, tricks & lessons learned to meditation and breath work modules. Please reach out if you’d like to learn more, and follow along as I start to bring 💔❤️‍🩹❤️💙

Trigger warning: this post is a reflection on triggering events AND lesson learned. You’ve been warned 😉

It’s been almost 4 years since my high risk pregnancy and 3 years since his open heart surgery. True there’s been scares, sicknesses, ER visits, and semi-annual cardiology visits, but overall, things have been going really well ::knock on wood for fear of jinxing myself::. Today, we finally ripped the bandaid off on the blood work he’s needed for his allergy panel. I was avoiding it because I knew it would be traumatic for him, and it was just as awful as I expected.

What I didn’t expect, was how *I* would physically react to the event. As soon as I heard the screams of another little one, my body completely tensed up, my heart raced and my palms got sweaty. I was transported right back to that pre-op room when my 4 month old was getting his blood drawn for surgery & screaming bloody murder. Needless to say, I was on edge before Hayden even sat down in the chair. He then got so worked up I had to physically hold him back, which only further provoked me, and him. I’ll spare you all the details, but it was exhausting. I was so wiped not even a Starbucks espresso could keep me awake once nap-time hit.

Now, this is where the lesson comes into play: honor your body. Don’t power through, don’t bottle it up, don’t self-medicate, sit down and really listen to what you need. For me, it was a nap, clearing my to-do list, and just sitting & enjoying time with my little guy. I never imagined having such a big response to my child’s lab appointment, but I did, and I recognized the signs of my PTSD thanks to my therapy sessions. Instead of pretending it didn’t bother me, I took a time out and tuned inward. A huge step helping me see the progress I’ve made.

While this feels like a journal entry, I hope a fellow mama will read this and realize it’s okay to have unexpected emotions, and to listen to your body, and to honor it. We’re always so busy taking care of our kids we put ourselves last, at the expense of our own mental health. Take a breath, take a beat, and honor you, too. ❤️

Holding space for anyone who is having a hard time dealing with media this week. Between May being mental health awareness month & the recent news of Roe v. Wade - May is feeling really heavy already and it’s only day 4.

I’m not going to come on here and preach a stance because I know everyone is entitled to an opinion. I just know the concept of TFMR was a reality in my story, and a large part of what drives me today to help other moms who feel hopeless.

I just want you to know if you’re feeling hopeless and overwhelmed, I’m holding space for you too.