Beauty In The Breakdown

“Farmhouse”

The farm I’ve always envisioned
Well it would have sheep
I simply adore sheep
And when I say sheep I mean all sheep
The scruffy sheep
The trimmed sheep
The black sheep...
Scruffy and out of shape, lost their way from the herd,
Trimmed and uptight, with an ego bigger than a jocks,
Black and abandoned, guarded in a Shield of defense mechanisms,
Yes, I simply adore all sheep.
Your sheep, his sheep , the sheep.
Yet, my roots run deeper with the black sheep rather than the other 2,
Yes, it’s true,
It is because I am one of them;
I am the forgotten,
The rejected,
The angry
The black sheep,
The one who fell in to deep,
The one who no one wanted to keep,
I am a forgotten,
Yes, an apple that was rotten,
Yet, the seeds still ripe
As if it was never the rotten type.

11/17/20 @ 4:10 A.M

Dear Creator,
I surrender my fear that lives in tomorrow,
I surrender my need to control today,
I surrender the burden of yesterday,
I surrender.
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03/30/20

“Here I Am”
I feel like I can take my hair down,
Allow my guard to sink to our feet,
Allow you to give me your Love,
Allow myself to give you my Love,
I feel my throat closing,
I am scared,
I am a broken little girl,
I am afraid one day you will leave too,
Why would you want to stick around?
Why would you see me as lovable if I’m not lovable?
All the words I won’t say,
All the words I can’t say,
All the words I don’t know how to say,
Will you love me?
Will you teach me?
I feel my body lighting up,
In places filled with dust & webs,
When images of you swirl in my head,
How do I surrender?
How do I trust?
How do I love?
How do I Trust the Flow of the Universe?
How do I surrender to the Flow of Love?

6/22/20 ☸️💚