Poems From An Addict Inside

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A new poem for my followers:

Run From

Running from my emotions and the way I feel,
Still suppressing the pain what's the deal?
I'm confused about everything and hurting so bad,
Why do I look happy, but feel so sad?
It's hard to explain these feelings because I don't know what they are,
Is that weird that I can't, is that bazaar?
I just know that I'm in my head and I don't know why,
I just want to sit here, but I don't want to cry.
That's normal for me to not let things out,
Because I'm the strong one and never confused all about.
I'm always there for everyone except for myself,
That right there is insanity in itself.
It's a vicious cycle that goes on in my head,
And the disease I have tells me I'm better off dead.
But it's all lies that I convince myself it's true,
I just don't know what else to do.
Do I continue to run or stay and fight?
Do I stay in the dark or run to the light?
Do I feel the pain and let it go?
Or do I keep it deep down inside, I don't know?
I hate feeling pain that's what I always run,
Someday I'll succumb to the pain and then I'll be done.
I'll be done running from all the pain,
I'll be done running from everything insane.
I'll be done running from the light,
And I'll be putting up a fight.
A fight to survive this thing we call life,
A fight to survive this sharp knife.
A fight to survive everything I've been through,
And to let go of everything I've hung on to!

Written by Melissa DeJesus