Julie's Writing

This is the 5th date I've been on and I'm officially tired.
My mom has literally hooked me up with almost all the sons of her friends from the women's group on WhatsApp ..its exhausting.
I can say I've met the good, the bad and the ugly.

The first time I met jide was on a blind date set up by my “ african mother" who still thinks marriages are meant to be arranged, in this time and age where "Gen z's " go out and mingle only to marry their childhood sweetheart.

Jide is 5'2 and a fine jar of chocolate, with his smoothly carved hair line, you'd mistake him for a 20 year old, he has this baby face so innocent but that man is 30, I wasn't so surprised myself because people also mistake me to be in my late 30s- small 25year old like me !!

I had on a beautiful red gown with a not-too-high slit, black heels and black handbag to match. My makeup was light and I had a pair of earrings to go with my natural hair packed in a bun.
I sighted jide when he came to pick me up from the house, I watched excitedly as he alighted from his white Range rover car , he wore a really nice dark straight jeans with a casual shirt and sneakers.

He was really romantic at first, I’ve always known yourba men to be unromantic and c***y the same reasons they are called “Yoruba demons” but I could feel butterflies in my belly already, he took my hands and opened the door for me and we drove off.

So we went to là restaurant là specialè, it was a beautiful place on the Island and a sight to behold...they had the best foods I almost ordered everything on their menu. I got the spicy Jollof rice with turkey and a cartoon of Chivita orange juice to go with while jide got the standard Ofada rice served on a leaf and a bottle of red wine.

While we ate, we kept throwing glances at each other and I almost accepted the thought of things working out between us , after all he's a pastor and I like godly men. He also made jokes about me (some were really insensitive) like when he said I'd look more pretty if my forehead wasn't competing for space with my eyebrows...that one enter o but I laughed it off because I wanted to be nice.

Few minutes into our food, I noticed something really weird about him.

Man was particular about everything I did, from how I held my fork to how I put the food in my mouth even how I chewed.
"My dear, your mouth isn't supposed to move like that when you're chewing, it makes you look like a goat eating grass" Ah!
Me?? Eating like a goat???

I wanted to say something but was too stunned to speak before he landed me another blow by saying I should have only asked for salads because I need to watch my weight...I'm not even fat.

He tried wiping my mouth with the salvet but I stopped him halfway, cleaned my mouth and was about to grab my drink before he stopped me and said "my dear, don't rush your drink, you could choke..... and that was it, I've had enough so I stood up in anger but tried so much to not create a scene, called the waiter who served us, sorted out the bill and left.

Jide called me 3weeks later apologising for how he acted on our date saying he just wanted me to be comfortable, it was too late because I had another date.

Juliet.

What if I tell you there is a solution to everything ??
A cure to humanities never ending issues?
A cream for a blemished skin?
A medicine for a botched nose job?
An eye drop for averting eyes?
A lotion for ugliness?
A cream to make you fat; and
A tube to make you skinny?
An ointment for handicaps and broken limbs?
A capsule for anti-aging?
A time machine to go back to the past?
A few lucky chant that makes you rich and famous?
A cure for all kinds of diseases?
A man for all women and
A woman for all men?
A prayer to bring back the dead?
An injection that makes you the smartest person in the world?
A liquid that changes your motorbike to Benz?
A chemical that automatically grows a giant money tree in front of your house?
An injection to make animals talk?
A spray that makes you feel better?
A chemical portion that makes you perfect?
A cure that duplicates every cure ?

What if I tell you that there's an end to war, famine and suffering rendering money essentially obsolete?? What then is the reason for the strive and lack of contentment?

For this same reason, nothing is perfect, no one is perfect, nothing lasts forever and so is no one.

BUT,

What happens when it's all gone?
When the solutions you seek don't come the way you want it?
What happens when greed becomes the order of the day and no one is held accountable??
What happens when it's all fake.

Nothing lasts forever even so nothing is perfect except GOD!

-Juliet