Machine Learning PNW

XVI 3.14.2026 Western Fjord Landmass and Atmospheric Local Energy presents — Producer/Event Head/Advocate MARK HARDY configured for cross sound visitation privileges :: low-maintenance in region gateway music selectors RAMIRO//DRAWBIRD attached for handshake sets. Come yell at our computers with us, it will make us all feel better.

@ The Lumber Yard. $10 presale. Link in bio.

March 14th // 9-2 // COMMIT

XV 2.14.2026 Alt-Fidelity Implemented//Cinematic Expansion Active//Fernweh Present — Localized Producer AshWave loaded for nostalgic wavelengths :: variable support programs RAMIRO//DRAWBIRD side-loaded. Downgrade your bus speed, widen your bandwidth, and sync with our datastream.

The Lumber Yard bar. $10 presale, $15 at the door.

February 14th // 9-2 // patch notes END

Coming in hot with your Q1 roster...

XIII 12.13.2025 System Update// ANNIVERSARY MODE ACTIVATED: One year of updates confirmed — organic TILTED jukebox JON LEE in the dwelling. Alternate housing, expansion of dwelling imminent. Resident replicants BLUETECH//RAMIRO//DRAWBIRD supporting annual patch protocol. Update your programming, jeer at the machines, we dare you.

At the Lumber Yard bar. $10 presale, $15 at the door.

December 13th // ONE YEAR ANNIVERSARY Sideload complete.

Ticket link in bio.

XII 11.08.2025 System Update// Fall firmware loading — organic guest jukebox BEXX placement authorized, bass bin calibrating.  Resident replicants RAMIRO//DRAWBIRD supporting version control milestones.  Come be programmed to be different.

At the Lumber Yard bar.  $10 presale, $15 at door.

November 8th // Sideload complete.

XI 10.11.2025 System Update// Fraktured code alert — organic guest jukebox MISS MIN.D uploaded for broken rhythm repair and vibe adjustments. Resident replicants supporting inception and exodus. Come tell us how your AI really feels.

$10 presale, $15 at the door. Ticket link in bio.

System Update: new module detected — guest organic selector RECESS /Shameless/ installed for maximum dancefloor efficiency, with resident replicants piping brainwashing tunes while subliminal programming lulls you into a sense of security. Come tell our AI how you really feel.

September 13th. Contribute to the collective.

We regret to inform our guests that the replicants we employed to mix drinks and spin tracks have been... decommissioned.

While their efficiency was unmatched, their behavior became extremely horrendous and frankly, just weird. One replaced the entire cocktail menu with engine oil shots “for maximum performance.” Another remixed every song into a 47-minute dubstep national anthem medley.

Fortunately for us, we were just added to a WhatsApp group chat run by a tech veteran Hal, who just retired in Bali by cashing out half of his Bitcoin, and he's totally going to tell us how to do it too. Anyway Hal has hooked us up with a whole bunch of really great, really new, really sane simulants to fill in for our next event. The only downside is that they are all named Dave, so please be sure to point at the Dave you are talking to so they don't get confused.

We apologize for the inconvenience and any unsolicited lectures on robotic superiority you may have received.

Thank you for your patience as we recalibrate our hiring protocols. 🤖

See you July 12th, get your presales at the link in bio.

It is with a leaden heart and sincere regret that due to the recent changes in the economy and wide sweeping impact of advancements in technology, we must inform you that all DJs, visual artists, and bartenders have been replaced with AI replicants.

With our new LDMs in place, we look forward to providing you the same outstanding entertainment services you expect from Machine Learning PNW, with minimal risk of singularity raids.

To facilitate this transition to silicon integration, presale discount codes for June will be widely available at the following behavioral programming sites:
.design .live

Stay tuned for codes.

See you June 14th.