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Solutions Psychological Services

Solutions Psychological Services

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A complete and caring approach to address your therapy or assessment needs. Therapy for children, adults or couples.

I thought I was so good at being a girlfriend. And boys? They just suck, you know? They really do. Until I found myself, again, broken up, sobbing on my bedroom floor thinking, “What the hell? Again?” I really thought this was it. I thought I was going to marry this man. I even have a baby with him. But no. And that’s when something in me shifted. I paused and asked, “Okay, maybe boys suck but what am I doing?” That question changed my life. Now, as a couples counselor and relationship coach, I can name exactly what I was doing. I was playing not to lose, instead of playing to win. It’s something I see all the time especially in people who carry shame from childhood. Playing not to lose looks like: 👉 “Who do you want me to be?” 👉 Walking on eggshells. 👉 “How do I make sure you don’t get mad at me, leave me, or pull away?” But playing to win? That sounds like: 💛 “How do I love you better?” 💛 “How do I love me better?” 💛 “How do we build the relationship we both deserve?” It’s like the difference between cleaning your house because you're scared someone will be mad vs. cleaning your house because you want to share a beautiful, joyful space with someone you love. Very different vibes. Same thing in dating. Playing not to lose means pretending to be someone they’ll like rejecting yourself before they even get the chance. But playing to win? It means showing up fully as you. And if they reject you? Good. They’re not your person. Not a bad person, just not your person. 💫 And that’s a win. 08/26/2025

I thought I was so good at being a girlfriend. And boys? They just suck, you know? They really do. Until I found myself, again, broken up, sobbing on my bedroom floor thinking, “What the hell? Again?” I really thought this was it. I thought I was going to marry this man. I even have a baby with him. But no. And that’s when something in me shifted. I paused and asked, “Okay, maybe boys suck but what am I doing?” That question changed my life. Now, as a couples counselor and relationship coach, I can name exactly what I was doing. I was playing not to lose, instead of playing to win. It’s something I see all the time especially in people who carry shame from childhood. Playing not to lose looks like: 👉 “Who do you want me to be?” 👉 Walking on eggshells. 👉 “How do I make sure you don’t get mad at me, leave me, or pull away?” But playing to win? That sounds like: 💛 “How do I love you better?” 💛 “How do I love me better?” 💛 “How do we build the relationship we both deserve?” It’s like the difference between cleaning your house because you're scared someone will be mad vs. cleaning your house because you want to share a beautiful, joyful space with someone you love. Very different vibes. Same thing in dating. Playing not to lose means pretending to be someone they’ll like rejecting yourself before they even get the chance. But playing to win? It means showing up fully as you. And if they reject you? Good. They’re not your person. Not a bad person, just not your person. 💫 And that’s a win.

“Marriage is never 50/50.” — Brené Brown Listen to my interview with Brené Brown: tim.blog/podcast #marriage #brenebrown 06/22/2025

“Marriage is never 50/50.” — Brené Brown Listen to my interview with Brené Brown: tim.blog/podcast #marriage #brenebrown

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Category

Counseling & Mental Health

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Telephone

+17805128812

Website

Address


8609 102 Street
Grande Prairie, AB
T8V2S5

Opening Hours

Monday 9am - 5pm
Tuesday 9am - 5pm
Wednesday 9am - 5pm
Thursday 9am - 5pm
Friday 9am - 5pm