Intuitive Birthing

Just a few spooky things that have been said... 👻😱🤡

You shouldn't just listen blindly. You check in with your intuition.

Intuition; an inner voice that we oftentimes choose to disregard or not listen to as a means to appease others feelings, priotizing them over ourselves.

If you've ever had a gut feeling or your intuition screaming, you know what inner voice I'm referring to - that's who should be leading your pregnancy and birth experience.

Conversations with care providers, partners, family members or friends could be influencing your choices, it's important to step back and remember what's important to you and invite only those who respect and trust your choices into your space, both mental and physical.

For the woman who is looking for that deep & transformative experience that birth can be, you need to be so strong in your beliefs and desires about birth and follow your intuition. She will guide you.

What does it do everytime you disregard your intuition?

Every time you listen to someone else and do as your "told"; you turn off the connection with yourself, lose a little bit of power and control each time, and eventually won't even be able to hear your intuition speaking to you.

Who is making YOUR decisions?

Throwback to 2014 - (Almost) 1 year anniversary with this amazing man and father-to-be and 5 days overdue with Grayson ❤️

Feels so long ago, yet like it was yesterday 🥺

This time of the year is always so special to us as we celebrate our anniversary and the birth of our son. Always a beautiful reflection of how far we've come, how much we've grown, and all that we've learned.

Love you Bev & our babies that give life purpose💚💛❤️

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These ideas and phrasing mostly surfaces when I am working with clients who have Midwives.

✨ When you're preparing for your homebirth, prepare for your homebirth! You don't need to have a "Plan B" just in case! This is preparing your mind that most likely something will happen, or you won't be strong enough to cope with the pain, etc. But instead of preparing this way - you rephrase this by saying, there doesn't need to be a plan b. Be confident in yourself and your choices. And quite possibly, rethink who you're talking to - if they're not supporting, encouraging and uplifting you - don't speak to them. Protect your mental space, that's way more important.

✨ The idea of packing a hospital bag "just in case" is one that exists only for homebirths - there is no other time that we are told/advised to do this.
❓Do you have a "just in case" bag in your car in case you're in a car accident?
❓Or maybe you're just walking outside - do you have a "just in case" bag?

Most likely your answer is no! So why would you at birth? Preparing for a homebirth means preparing your mind and body - not planning for transfer. That has been placed in your mind by your Midwife. Birth is normal, it has happened for hundreds and thousands of years, and only for the last 100 have we been "packing hospital bags".

✨ Preparing your birth plan is more about yourself - it's about figuring out your research, what works for you, what you want, etc. BUT being so intentional with your birth plan to have it in the back of your mind that "things might change" is not the mindset you should be carrying when entering your birth phase.

Preparing for birth sometimes means cutting out those that are negative and only share bad or scary stories. Preparing for birth means filling your cup, mind and days with beautiful stories, supportive conversations, and a supportive birth team who doesn't fear the process.

When I was 41+5 days pregnant with Grayson, I went into labor, so naturally I assumed I'd be starting my second labor process around the same time. I was wrong; I was pregnant for another week! When I reflect back, I can see the lessons that I could take from both pregnancies.

✨Patience
I was challenged so much that those last few weeks of pregnancy are uncomfortable, then add going "over" with constant messages, it can test patience! But everyday I reminded myself that there were two people on this journey: my little girl and I, and she knows when the time is right for her.

✨Trust
I learned to trust in myself and intuition more and more as those around me, including my Midwifery Team, doubted that it was normal to carry past 40 weeks. Her presence actually stressed me out rather than empower and encourage me, as a soon-to-be laboring woman should be. I trusted that it was better for my mindset to not engage with her often. A woman who is about to labor needs support, encouragement and positive reminders, not mistrust and projection of others' fears.

✨Prediction is impossible
There is no algorithm, chart or equation that will accurately figure out when you're going into labor. No ultrasound can predict the size or when baby is coming, no cervical exam can predict "how much longer", and definitely not research from the 1800s with a small sample of women is going to tell me what is accurate or not because it's just simply not predictable.

✨Surrender
To simply surrender to the unknowns of this journey. My baby decides when the time is right and she is fully developed, who was I to intervene with the process? I repeated this over and over to remind myself. The mental battle of those days are challenging; the battle between the deep messaging you received of birth throughout your life and the re-learning of what birth can look like, have a way of ebb and flowing. This is why surrendering to your journey is important. You are not in control, no one is.

This one's for the Dad's!

You have a very powerful role during pregnancy and birth of your baby. And yes, "we are pregnant" but your experience spiritually, physically and emotionally differs greatly than hers and her desires and birth wishes should be respected and supported.

She will experience discomfort - it is not your job to "feel bad" for her, it's your job to remind she is powerful and can overcome it all.

She will be vocal - it is not your job to "quiet her", it is your job to support her as she works through each surge, especially as they grow in intensity and frequency.

She will doubt herself - it is not your job to doubt her as well, it is your job to remind her as many more times as needed that she's got this.

A woman experiences an array of emotions and feelings during labor; support her as she goes through, don't allow your discomfort to take over her experience.

She is in the driver seat. Don't make her second guess her intuition, trust her as the Mother of your children.