Amanda Hess Coaching

Your brain is allowed to have negative thoughts.

Seriously.
You do not need to spend your whole life trying to “fix” your mind.

As a life coach, I don’t panic when my brain offers me fear, insecurity, self-doubt, or worst-case scenarios. I just don’t camp out there anymore.

I change lanes.

I don’t make the thought mean something about me.
I don’t spiral because my nervous system got activated.
I don’t treat every thought like truth.

Your brain will sometimes offer old conditioning, fear, people-pleasing, catastrophizing, shame. That doesn’t mean you’re broken or failing at healing.

It just means you’re human.

The power is in learning you can notice the thought… without becoming the thought. 💛

The truth is that mantras can cause anxiety because they create dissonance instead of cooperation with your brain. And journaling just creates rumination and reinforcing old patterns and beliefs.

But asking yourself powerful questions? This gives your brain “buy in”. And when your brain buys in, your body buys it. This is where real transformation occurs. This is where anxiety shrinks instead of growing.

I go through this in detail in today’s Love Yourself No Matter What Podcast. Episode 311: Why Mantras & Journaling Aren’t Working (And What To Do Instead)

And if you want to do it right now, here are 5 questions to ask yourself to start reducing anxiety today.

1 If you believed you belonged in the world, how would you show up differently to yourself today? What would you start doing? What would you stop doing?What would you start doing? What would you stop doing?

2 If you could stop worrying about what other people think, what is one thing you would stop doing immediately? What if you did that today? What are you afraid of? What would it be like to feel the fear and do it anyways?

3 If today was your last day on earth, what is one thing that would no longer matter to you? Why? What would you need to believe to let that thing go today?

4 What stops you from believing you are beautiful exactly the way you are right now? When did you start believing that wasn’t beautiful? Would you want your kids or someone you love to believe that about themselves? What is the value of keeping this belief? What would be the value of releasing this belief?

5 What if the problem isn’t you? How would you approach your relationships differently if this was true? What boundaries would you place? What would need to change in you to be able to do this?

Feel free to drop your answers in the comments.