Esprit Learning

This is what our sessions actually look like — and it might not be what you'd expect!

There is no checklist. No flashcards. No "good job" for doing what we asked - not even us asking anyone to do anything! There is play. There is following a child's lead. There is trust that when a child feels safe and connected, they grow.

At Esprit Learning, our work is play-based, child-led, and grounded in naturalistic approaches. We sit on the floor. We follow the child's interests. We let them show us what they need. And we work alongside parents, because you know your child better than anyone.

We are so excited to announce that we have a new associate joining us and are now accepting new clients, ages 4–12, in West Vancouver, North Vancouver, and East Vancouver. If this feels like the kind of support you have been looking for, please reach out — link in bio or send us a message.

Happy Neurodiversity Celebration Week. All kinds of minds, all kinds of play.

For some learners, everyday demands feel like threats. Avoidance might just be a nervous system that has moved into protective mode.

For these learners, the skills might be there... what changes is access. And access depends on how safe the child feels, not how motivated they are.

What if the question we need to ask is "what does this child need to feel safe enough to access what they already know?"

When a child is avoiding everything from getting dressed to even the things they enjoy, it can look like defiance.

But what if it's can't, not won't? What if that avoidance isn't willful - what if it's protective? A nervous system responding to perceived threat in the only way it knows how.

PDA is a profile where everyday demands are experienced as overwhelming. The nervous system perceives threat and avoidance becomes the way the body tries to restore safety. This isn't something a child is choosing. It's something they're experiencing.

And when when the adults around them, don't understand that they approaches we use can cause real harm.

On February 27, I delivered a keynote at the 18th annual BC Association for Behaviour Analysis conference exploring what happens when traditional approaches fall short for autonomy-focused learners, and what it looks like when we create safety autonomy and trust instead.

Some of what I shared:
- Skills may be present – access shifts with the nervous system state
- What looks like refusal is often the system protecting itself
- Masking at school doesn't mean a child is fine. It often means the cost is being paid at home
- Collaboration before demands isn't lowering the bar. It's changing the path.
- The goal isn't to get through to the child, it's to create conditions where the child can get through to us

I care about this work deeply as a clinician and as a parent who did not have the supports I truly needed. My goal for this talk was not to have all of the answers, it was to look at our framework and begin asking questions and inspire further learning alongside my colleagues.

I was honored to be invited to speak and even more honored to have had incredible conversations and professional collaborations since then.

BehaviorAnalysis
BehaviourAnalysis DemandAvoidance AutismParenting NeurodivergentKids ASpreeLearning KeynoteSpeaker BC–ABBA NeurodiverseFamily AutonomyMatters

3 workshops and a panel in two weeks and another tomorrow! It has been such an energizing couple of weeks sharing ideas with educators and families about supporting autonomy driven learners! Tomorrow I am excited to be offering a workshop titled "Empowering the Independent Spirit" and we will be exploring ways to support autonomy driven learners with a neurodiversity affirming perspective. Together we will explore the nervous system connection, strategies that support flexibility and most of all, connection.