FIT - Fun In Training

Why Hiring a Coach Means Letting Go of the Steering Wheel

One of the biggest mistakes people make when they hire a coach is wanting change while still holding tightly to the habits, beliefs, and routines that kept them stuck in the first place.

It’s a bit like paying for a sat nav, then ignoring every direction because you’re convinced your usual route is quicker… even though that route has had you driving in circles for years.

If you’ve reached the point where you’ve invested in a coach, trainer, or professional, there has to be an honest reason behind it. Usually, it’s because what you’ve been doing on your own hasn’t produced the results you wanted.

That’s not failure. It’s feedback!

But here’s where people get in their own way: they want expert guidance, right up until that guidance asks them to do something that feels unfamiliar, inconvenient, uncomfortable, or difficult!

“I’ll do the workouts, but I don’t want to lift heavy and get bulky”

“I want to lose body fat, but I’m not changing my eating habits.”

“I want progress, but only if it fits neatly inside my comfort zone.”

Imagine calling a plumber because your bathroom is flooding, then standing over their shoulder saying, “I know it’s leaking there, but I don’t want you touching that pipe because it looks complicated.”

Sounds ridiculous, doesn’t it?

Yet people do exactly this with coaching all the time.

You cannot ask for transformation while negotiating with the very behaviours that are keeping you where you are.

Growth will challenge your routines.

It will expose excuses you’ve become comfortable repeating to yourself that aren't serving you.

It will ask you to trust a process before you can see the outcome.

That discomfort? That’s usually the sign that something is shifting.

Think about learning to drive. At first, everything feels awkward. You overthink every mirror check, every gear change, every junction. It feels unnatural because it’s new. But if you quit every time something felt uncomfortable, you’d never gain confidence or freedom.

Fitness, health, and mindset change work exactly the same way.

The truth is, comfort rarely creates progress.

The clients who see the biggest changes aren’t always the most naturally gifted or the fittest when they start. They’re the ones willing to lean in when things feel hard. They trust the process long enough to let the magic happen.

That doesn’t mean blindly following without communication. A good coach listens, adapts when needed, and works with your lifestyle, limitations, and goals.

But there’s a big difference between honest communication and resistance disguised as preference.

Sometimes what you need won’t be what you feel like doing.

That’s where coaching matters most.

Real change often starts with doing the very thing you’ve been avoiding.

So if you’ve hired a coach, trust why you made that decision.

You didn’t invest because your old way was getting you where you wanted to go.

You invested because you’re ready for a different result.

And different results demand different actions.

If growth feels uncomfortable, good.

You’re probably exactly where you need to be.

Do We Really Need to Train Differently After 40?

If you’ve spent the last few years hearing that women over 40 should ditch cardio, lift heavy, only train in certain hormone phases and basically exercise according to the moon cycle… you’re not alone.

A recent article in The Guardian explored the growing debate around whether women should train differently from men — especially during perimenopause and menopause.

And honestly? There’s some truth in it…

First things first: women are not “small men.”

Our hormones, muscle structure, recovery patterns and metabolism are different. For decades, most sports science research was done on men, which means women were often given fitness advice that didn’t fully match what our bodies actually need.

Once we hit our 40s and hormones begin fluctuating, things can change again. Many women notice:

🫶🏽 slower recovery

🫶🏽 more fatigue

🫶🏽 increased body fat around the middle

🫶🏽 loss of muscle tone

🫶🏽 lower bone density

🫶🏽 sleep disruptions

This is where strength training becomes incredibly important.

The article highlights the work of exercise physiologist Stacy Sims, who believes women over 40 should focus more on heavy resistance training and less on endless moderate cardio sessions.

Now before everyone panics and throws their running shoes in the bin… cardio is NOT bad.

But here’s the important bit:
hours of exhausting “burn calories” cardio combined with undereating can leave menopausal women feeling drained, inflamed and losing muscle instead of building a strong body.

And muscle matters more than ever as we age.

Muscle supports:

💜 metabolism

💜 bone health

💜 balance

💜 strength

💜 insulin sensitivity

💜 daily function

💜 confidence

So yes — lifting weights is one of the best things women can do after 40.

But it doesn’t mean you have to become a powerlifter.

Walking, hiking, swimming, yoga, Pilates, cycling, dancing and strength training ALL count. The best exercise is the one you can actually stick to consistently.

The real takeaway isn’t “stop cardio.”
It’s: stop punishing your body.

Train to build yourself up, not shrink yourself down.

That means:

💪🏽 prioritising protein

💪🏽 lifting challenging weights

💪🏽 recovering properly

💪🏽 sleeping enough

💪🏽 keeping daily movement high

💪🏽 managing stress

💪🏽 doing cardio for health and enjoyment, not just calorie burn

Research also shows women may actually gain greater health benefits from exercise than men do — sometimes with less overall volume.

So if you’re in your 40s, 50s or beyond and feeling frustrated because your old “eat less, move more” approach suddenly stopped working… your body isn’t broken.

It’s just asking for a smarter approach.

Less punishment.
More strength.
More recovery.
More nourishment.
And definitely less obsession with spending hours on a treadmill trying to “earn” your food.

Strong is no longer just about aesthetics.

It’s about staying capable, healthy, energetic and independent for life.

So I'm doing everything right—the protein, the water, the stretching—and still waking up feeling like my body is running on Windows 98. Lagging. Freezing. Error 404: muscle not found.

Funny… because it’s true.

But here’s the part you don’t see.

Being a trainer isn’t just about showing up in gym gear, full of energy, shouting “one more rep!” with a big smile on my face. That version of me? She’s real… but she’s not the whole me.

Some days, I walk into work feeling strong, energised, and ready to go. Other days? I’m tired. I’ve not slept properly. My hormones are doing their own chaotic thing. My hip might be niggling. Life outside the gym might feel heavy. There are days where the last thing I feel like doing is being “on.”

But I show up anyway.

Because when you walk into my class or my session, it’s not about me anymore—it’s about you.

So I switch it on.

I become the motivator, the energy, the one who lifts the room. I coach, I encourage, I correct form, I celebrate your wins. I listen to your frustrations, your worries, your “I almost didn’t come today” stories. I hold space for all of that… even if, internally, I’m carrying my own version of the same things.

And I do it with a smile.

Not because it’s fake—but because it’s part of the role. It’s the responsibility I take seriously. You deserve that environment. You deserve someone who shows up fully for you, even on the days it’s hard.

But behind that? I’m human too.

I get sore. I get exhausted. I have days where my body feels like it’s betrayed me despite doing all the “right” things. I have moments where I feel overwhelmed, stretched thin, or just… not 100%.

And yet, I still lead.

That’s the part people don’t always see—the emotional load of being the “strong one,” the “positive one,” the “consistent one.” The one who has to bring the energy even when her own battery is blinking red.

So if you ever wonder why your trainer seems like they’ve got it all together…

Just know: we don’t 🤪💪🏽🤘🏼

We just care enough to show up anyway.

And maybe that’s the real message behind this post 🙂

It’s not about being perfect. It’s about doing your best, even when things aren’t ideal. It’s about consistency over perfection. It’s about showing up—lagging, freezing, slightly broken some days—and still giving what you can.

So the next time your body throws you an “Error 404,” or life feels a bit heavy…

Remember—you’re not the only one pushing through.

We’re right there with you.

It’s not the food!

Let’s have a little honesty moment, shall we?

Blokes overeat and go, “Ah well… bit carried away there,” and crack on with life.

Women? Oh no. We spiral like we’ve just committed a crime against humanity.

One extra slice of cake and suddenly it’s:
“I’m disgusting.”
“I’ve ruined everything.”
“I may as well eat the entire kitchen now and start again Monday.”

Sound familiar? Thought so.

We attach so much meaning to food that it stops being just food. It becomes a reflection of our discipline, our worth, our success… our identity. So when we “mess up,” it doesn’t feel like a moment—it feels like a personal failure.

And what do we do next?

We punish ourselves.

Less food. More cardio. “I’ll be extra good tomorrow.”
Which, surprise surprise, leads to being starving, fed up, and right back elbow-deep in snacks two days later.

Welcome to the never-ending cycle:
Overeat → guilt → restrict → repeat.

It’s exhausting.

Here’s the truth most people don’t want to hear:
Overeating isn’t the problem. It’s the reaction to it that causes the chaos.

Because most of the time, we’re not eating out of hunger—we’re eating because life is life-ing.

Stress. Hormones. Boredom. Frustration. Anxiety. That one person who tests your patience daily 🙃

Food becomes the quick fix. The edge-taker-offer. The “just five minutes of peace” solution.

And listen—I’m not saying you can never enjoy food like that. Of course you can. But when it’s your only coping strategy? That’s when things get messy.

What if, instead of going straight to the cupboard, you changed the outlet?

Go for a walk. Clear your head.
Have a laugh. Ring a mate.
Or yes… a cheeky bit of bedroom cardio works wonders too 😏

The point is—give yourself options.

Now here’s where it gets really interesting…

Most women are stuck in this constant “eat less, do more” mindset because they’re chasing fat loss at all costs. And that thinking? It keeps you trapped.

Flip the script.

Start focusing on building something instead of constantly trying to shrink.

Hypertrophy—fancy word for building lean muscle—is about growth. Strength. Fueling your body properly. And when you start eating to support performance instead of punish yourself?

Everything changes.

You stop fearing food.
You stop obsessing over every bite.
And ironically… your body starts responding better too.

Funny that, isn’t it?

Look, you don’t need to be perfect. You don’t need to “start again Monday.” And you definitely don’t need to tie your self-worth to what you ate yesterday.

You just need to stop being so bloody hard on yourself.

Because the version of you you’re chasing?
She’s not hiding behind restriction and guilt.

She’s built through consistency, balance… and a bit of sass along the way.

So next time you overdo it?

Say “whoops”… and move on.

Just like the blokes do 😉