The Counterfeit Stones

🚨 𝗙𝗥𝗘𝗦𝗛 𝗔𝗟𝗘𝗥𝗧 𝗙𝗥𝗢𝗠 𝗧𝗛𝗘 𝗪𝗢𝗥𝗟𝗗 𝗢𝗙 𝗤𝗨𝗘𝗦𝗧𝗜𝗢𝗡𝗔𝗕𝗟𝗘 𝗔𝗨𝗧𝗛𝗘𝗡𝗧𝗜𝗖𝗜𝗧𝗬 🚨

The Counterfeit Stones have once again been spotted travelling under suspicious circumstances… guitars, wigs, and at least one member insisting he’s “definitely in charge of the setlist”.

Authorities have confirmed: no actual qualifications were required to join this band.

🎸 𝗡𝗘𝗫𝗧 𝗦𝗧𝗢𝗣 𝗢𝗡 𝗧𝗛𝗘 “𝗧𝗛𝗜𝗦 𝗟𝗢𝗢𝗞𝗦 𝗟𝗘𝗚𝗜𝗧, 𝗛𝗢𝗡𝗘𝗦𝗧” 𝗧𝗢𝗨𝗥:

📍 Tunbridge Wells – Assembly Hall Theatre
🗓️ 21 May 2026
👉 https://www.thecounterfeitstones.com/gigs/tunbridge-wells-7/

Expect loud noises, highly confident pretending, and a level of rock ‘n’ roll commitment that really shouldn’t be legally available in provincial theatres.

But if you can’t make that one, don’t panic… we’re illegally assembling again very soon:

🔥 MORE SUSPECT ACTIVITY COMING UP:

📍 Ripley – 30 May
👉 https://www.thecounterfeitstones.com/gigs/ripley-4/

📍 Liverpool – 6 June
👉 https://www.thecounterfeitstones.com/gigs/liverpool-4/

📍 Hertfordshire – 3 July
👉 https://www.thecounterfeitstones.com/gigs/hertfordshire-3/

🎤 WARNING:
This show may cause spontaneous dancing, laughing at inappropriate moments, and the sudden urge to say “that was actually brilliant, wasn’t it?”

Tickets available now… before someone checks our paperwork.

See you there 😎🎸

🎤 𝗧𝗨𝗡𝗕𝗥𝗜𝗗𝗚𝗘 𝗪𝗘𝗟𝗟𝗦 — 𝗧𝗛𝗘 𝗖𝗢𝗨𝗡𝗧𝗘𝗥𝗙𝗘𝗜𝗧 𝗦𝗧𝗢𝗡𝗘𝗦 𝗔𝗥𝗘 𝗖𝗢𝗠𝗜𝗡𝗚 (𝗪𝗛𝗘𝗧𝗛𝗘𝗥 𝗬𝗢𝗨 𝗟𝗜𝗞𝗘 𝗜𝗧 𝗢𝗥 𝗡𝗢𝗧) 🎤

📅 𝗧𝗵𝘂𝗿𝘀𝗱𝗮𝘆 𝟮𝟭𝘀𝘁 𝗠𝗔𝗬

Right then, 𝗧𝘂𝗻𝗯𝗿𝗶𝗱𝗴𝗲 𝗪𝗲𝗹𝗹𝘀.

We’ve heard you like your entertainment refined, tasteful, and moderately British.

Unfortunately, we’ve arrived instead.

The Counterfeit Stones are rolling into 𝗔𝘀𝘀𝗲𝗺𝗯𝗹𝘆 𝗛𝗮𝗹𝗹 𝗧𝗵𝗲𝗮𝘁𝗿𝗲 with:

more swagger than is medically advisable
guitars that may or may not have seen court proceedings
and a level of rock ‘n’ roll impersonation that sits somewhere between “uncanny” and “should we call someone?”

Expect hits. Expect chaos. Expect your dignity to be lightly rearranged.

📍 𝗔𝘀𝘀𝗲𝗺𝗯𝗹𝘆 𝗛𝗮𝗹𝗹 𝗧𝗵𝗲𝗮𝘁𝗿𝗲, 𝗧𝘂𝗻𝗯𝗿𝗶𝗱𝗴𝗲 𝗪𝗲𝗹𝗹𝘀
🎟️ 𝗧𝗶𝗰𝗸𝗲𝘁𝘀 𝗵𝗲𝗿𝗲 (𝗯𝗲𝗳𝗼𝗿𝗲 𝘄𝗲’𝗿𝗲 𝘀𝘁𝗼𝗽𝗽𝗲𝗱):
https://www.assemblyhalltheatre.co.uk/whats-on/the-counterfeit-stones.html

Warning: may cause spontaneous air guitar, laughter, and mild suspicion that Mick might actually be in the building.

COUNTERFEIT STONES – Theatre Severn Why pay a fortune to see ants in a stadium when for a fraction of the price you can get up close and smell the faking brilliance of the Counterfeit Stones!

🎸 𝗔𝗧𝗧𝗘𝗡𝗧𝗜𝗢𝗡 𝗥𝗢𝗖𝗞 ‘𝗡’ 𝗥𝗢𝗟𝗟 𝗟𝗘𝗚𝗘𝗡𝗗 𝗔𝗣𝗣𝗥𝗘𝗡𝗧𝗜𝗖𝗘𝗦! 🎸

Exactly 𝟭 𝗠𝗢𝗡𝗧𝗛 𝗧𝗢 𝗚𝗢 until The Counterfeit Stones storm 𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗦𝘁𝗮𝗯𝗹𝗲𝘀 — where real rock meets fake moustaches, questionable dance moves, and absolutely ZERO regret 🤪

If you’ve ever thought, “𝘐 𝘸𝘪𝘴𝘩 𝘔𝘪𝘤𝘬 𝘑𝘢𝘨𝘨𝘦𝘳 𝘩𝘢𝘥 𝘢 𝘴𝘭𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵𝘭𝘺 𝘮𝘰𝘳𝘦 𝘢𝘧𝘧𝘰𝘳𝘥𝘢𝘣𝘭𝘦 𝘤𝘰𝘶𝘴𝘪𝘯…” — congratulations, this night was made for you 👀

Come for the riffs, stay for the chaos, and let’s be honest… come for our version of Satisfaction that’s 99% accurate and 100% ridiculous 😂

🗓 𝗦𝗮𝘁𝘂𝗿𝗱𝗮𝘆 𝟳 𝗠𝗮𝗿𝗰𝗵
📍 𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗦𝘁𝗮𝗯𝗹𝗲𝘀, 𝗠𝗶𝗹𝘁𝗼𝗻 𝗞𝗲𝘆𝗻𝗲𝘀
🎟️ 𝗧𝗶𝗰𝗸𝗲𝘁𝘀: Grab ’em before your mates do
https://stables.org/event/counterfeit-stones

𝟭 𝗺𝗼𝗻𝘁𝗵 𝘁𝗼 𝗿𝗼𝗰𝗸. 𝟯𝟬 𝗱𝗮𝘆𝘀 𝘁𝗼 𝘄𝗮𝗿𝗺 𝘂𝗽 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗮𝗶𝗿 𝗴𝘂𝗶𝘁𝗮𝗿. 𝟬 𝗲𝘅𝗰𝘂𝘀𝗲𝘀. 😎

👇 Tag a mate who needs to remind themselves they’re going too! 👇

🎸🤘