Kerry Wellbeing

The past 12 days have been filled with with shock, disbelief and deep sadness. The sudden death of my gorgeous brother Dan has left us all reeling. What has carried us through - especially my heartbroken Mum - is the huge outpouring of love for him, as well as love and support for us.

Thank you to everyone who has sent us thoughtful messages, friends calling with food or simply your presence, my Mum friends who have taken Freya, and Dan's wide circle of friends who have cried with us, as well as made us all laugh with many stories of Dan.

We gave Dan a beautiful send-off, a real celebration of the special son/brother/uncle/friend/colleague/running or biking buddy/doggie friend that he was. We are all heartbroken and it still feels quite surreal. As one of Dan's close friends said, there is a huge Dan-shaped hole.

Part of Dan's legacy is speaking openly about mental health challenges. About coming together, supporting each other, talking without fear of being judged.

Please don't let your mental health be the elephant in the room! Talk about it. Take the first step. You are not alone. ❤️

A couple of days after Dan's passing, I wrote this short piece which I read at his funeral. It expresses what was in my heart. I think it speaks for many of us. ❤️

Dan,

if you could feel just a fraction of the love here today, would we be here?
If you could have seen yourself like all who knew you, and loved you ..
If you could have held on just a little bit longer..

Maybe we could have done more. Maybe we missed some signs. Maybe we should have been stronger, taken charge...

Would you live another day or more?

So many questions.
Oh Dan .. there is already a huge void where you should be.

Your strong arms and loving hugs will be missed.
Your Dan humour will be missed.
Your listening ears and presence will be missed.

You are missed.

If only you were here.

Now forever young and strong, you're free to fly high, go as fast as you want
Be safe.

We love you Dan. ❤️

Do you ever put your own needs on your to do list? A walk, a dance class, or just a 30 minute break from everything else?

Its not easy, I know! But vital. For ourselves and those we're taking care of.

As a solo Mum, taking a walk on my own feels like a decadent luxury!

But it does me so much good, I have more energy, patience and generally feel in a much better place when I get home.

Theres always going to be an endless list. So, make YOURSELF that important task that can't wait, add yourself to the list.

And schedule it, commit to it.

It's possibly the most important thing you can do today. And eveyday, do something for you.

Go on, you can make just 30 minutes for that coffee in the sun. And just breathe ❤️

Not thriving… just surviving right now.

The past few months have been a lot. I have not posted here for a long time, but I have not disappeared. In fact, I'm learning that I have felt so overwhelmed with life, that Ive been quite stuck. Not staying connected to what's important to me.

Being unwell, Freya being unwell, me unwell again, starting a new part-time job, mothering, and now supporting my Mum through a sudden health issue.

As a solo Mum, the responsibility never switches off. Lately, I've been feeling more tired and depleted than I ever have.

But I keep reminding myself - this is a phase. It will pass.

Right now, I’m trying to find small moments for myself - even taking the time to do this post. Just ten minutes in the morning to sit, breathe, and feel the sun on my face. It helps.

I’m also learning that asking for help can make all the difference. It’s hard, but it’s necessary.

If you’re in a “just surviving” phase too, you’re not alone ❤️.