Something To Smile About

Rihanna one of the most richest woman in the world is drinking Heineken but you?? You?? With your 2 panties and 1 bra want to drink Moet!! 🙄

A man walks into a bar. He reaches into his pocket and pulls out a little man, maybe a foot tall and a little piano. He puts them both on the bar, and the little guy starts playing Mozart as the man orders his drink.
The bartender says "I'm sure it's none of my business, but where did you find a little man who plays piano like that?"
The guy says "There's a genie outside granting wishes, I bet he's still there if you hurry."
The bartender runs outside, and moments later a bunch of ducks come in through the front door and start causing a big ruckus. The bartender says "You didn't tell me the genie was deaf, I asked for a million bucks, not a million ducks."
The guy says
Do you really think I asked for an eleven inch pianist?"

Something To Smile About Comedy club

Guys beware, some girls are now using tomato ketchup as menstruation format... if she come and say that she's on... remove the pad and taste to confirm.
Thanks me later 😎

S*x and feelings

A man was brought before the judge and charged with NECROPHILIA (having s*x with a dead person). The judge told him, "In 20 years on the bench, I've never heard such a
disgusting, immoral thing. Just give me one good reason why I shouldn't lock you up and throw away the jail keys in the toilet?"
The man replied, "I'll give you THREE good reasons:
1. It's none of your damn business;
2. She was my wife; and...
3. I didn't KNOW she was dead, she ALWAYS acted that way!"

The case was dismissed and the judge announced the following warnings:

For the ladies:: PLEASE TRY
TO MOVE A LITTLE DURING
THE ACT.

For the guys: IF THERE IS
NOT MUCH MOVEMENT, STOP
IMMEDIATELY AND CHECK IF
SHE IS ALIVE ....!!! Case dismissed!