Real Talks

A beer company was hiring a taster, Someone to taste the beers before they are taken for selling. So they placed adverts and one afternoon, my friend walked into the manager's office asking to be employed.

The manager tried to figure out how he could drive him away but couldn't come up with an idea, so he decided to give him a trial. He ordered his secretary to give him a glass of wine 🍷

He took a sip and said, "It's Red wine, Varietal, three years old, grown on rift valley, matured in steel containers."

"That's correct!" The manager exclaimed, "Well give him another one let's see." So he was given.

He took a sip again and said, "It's Guinness, a combination of barley, roast malt extract, and brewers yeast brewed Around Airport road 2 years ago... imagine

"Incredible!" said the manager

Now the manager went closer to the secretary and whispered to her saying, "Go get some of your urine in a cup let's see if he will get that."

So my friend was given the cup of urine. He took a sip, turned to the manager and said, "Female urine, 26 years old, 2 weeks pregnant and if I'm not given this job, Sir I will tell your wife who is responsible for the pregnancy"

Both the manager and the secretary fainted.

Ninja Never Die😁

Do not fall in love with me

Do not fall in love
With people like me.
people like me
will love you so hard
that you turn into stone
into a statue where people
come to marvel at how long
it must have taken to carve
that faraway look into your eyes

Do not fall in love with people like me
we will take you to
museums and parks
and monuments
and kiss you in every beautiful
place so that you can
never go back to them
without tasting us
like blood in your mouth

Do not come any closer.
people like me
are bombs
when our time is up
we will splatter loss
all over your walls
in angry colors
that make you wish
your doorway never
learned our name

do not fall in love
with people like me.
with the lonely ones
we will forget our own names
if it means learning yours
we will make you think
hurricanes are gentle
that pain is a gift
you will get lost
in the desperation
in the longing for something
that is always reaching
but never able to hold

do not fall in love
with people like me.
we will destroy your
apartment
we will throw apologies at you
that shatter on the floor
and cut your feet

we will never learn
how to be soft

we will leave.
we always do.

GLAMORIZ

“Love Broken”

There is no moonlight
To guide my eyes tonight
So I cry in the dark love broken

I’ve dug many graves for love, so many different me’s
Never a proper burial though
But, roses do grow from tear clouds above

The hurt bleeds me, I’m losing the will to live
Time laughs at me again, telling me eternity will never let me go
I am not worthy of forgiveness, love me life, you will know

My words of love are lies, her reflection tells me goodbye
My sins shoot arrows, piercing me all through the night
Bleeding, I fill a cup and toast my last heartbeat right

There is nothing to find
For I leave nothing behind
Even my blood ink of poems disappears

I am a memory of disdain
Myself and others in pain
No apologies, for I am a poet of fears

IN MY EYES

Look me in my eyes
And say what you need to say
Don't be afraid to break my heart
I've cried all my tears away

Look me in my eyes
Do you really have it in you
To break this heart of mine
After all that I have been through

If my eyes could speak
Do you wonder what they'd say
Every little part of me
Is fighting for a better day

If my eyes could speak
Do you think they would still show
All the hurt that is inside me
That my eyes always disclose

Look me in my eyes
And say what you need to say
Don't be afraid to break my heart
I've cried all my tears away