That Clay Couple

Spoiler alert. “The Polygamist” on Netflix. Jonasi, Joyce, Essie, Matipa, Lindani. Y’all watched a cheating story. I watched something else. 🫣😳
I kept thinking about the kids. Sarah growing up hidden. Mpumi growing up resentful. Menzi growing up watching all of it happen and calling it normal. They didn’t choose any of that, but they absorbed it. The same way you absorb a your mother’s temper or a spouses silence. You learn love is tiring, unfair and includes disrespect.

I thought about the mothers too. You can’t raise a child soft when you yourself are running on empty. Matipa completely left the twins.
The depression. The crying. It seems like it has clean reason behind it, but not really. The levels of this dysfunction will knock down a nervous system. When you’ve been holding too much for too long, and finally speak, birthdays, s*x and sometimes forgiveness is not on your mind!

None of this started with polygamy. It started with exhaustion nobody called out the first, second or tenth time it hit. That tired kept going down the family line because nobody stopped to see if they, or anyone else, was ok.

Are you tired? Not the kind where you pack a bag and out the door! The kind where you’re still cooking dinner, still showing up to work and still smiling in pictures. All you want to do is get somewhere and be still.
Take the survey. Link’s in my bio. Find out where you’re at. -Auntie Ny

You don’t need another nap. You need relief. You call it stress because labeling it for what it really requires you to admit how much you’ve been carrying and you’re overloaded.

You’ve been carrying grown people. Their feelings. Their problems. Trying to protect them from the consequences of their choices. Moving to meet their expectations.

You’ve been carrying everybody so long you think exhaustion is your personality.
It ain’t. You’ve gotten so used to being the one everybody calls you don’t notice what’s happening.
Meanwhile, you’re disappearing. Your patience is getting shorter and shorter. You struggle to find a moment of joy. Your body is always tired. It’s gotten harder to lean on your faith. Relationships? Many days, you don’t want to talk to anyone.
The scary part is you think this is normal.
I can hear someone saying, “But if I don’t do it, who will?”

That question keeps you stuck. Somewhere, you decided, responsibility was going to be your name! Today, you carry things God never assigned to you.

If everybody has a piece of you and you’re not sure what’s left, comment HEAVY.
I’ve got a free download to figure out whether you’re simply busy or emotionally overloaded. If you already know the answer, this is definitely for you.-Auntie Ny