Azereael

We got our books back from SML!

I want to start by saying competitions are rough. They are hard to get through and as a first time competitor they can be confusing.

The whole team did a great job being there, supporting the class and making time to answer questions.

It was a hard competition.
I'm still very proud of being able to say I did this. I was part of this.

Now I need to address something.

I thought about how to address this because it should be addressed and publicly because this should not happen to any contestant ever.

Judges, when you are leaving comments and your docking of points are for sitting down, PLEASE PLEASE don't assume things.

I have a disability. I have KLS, one of the things I deal with from that is mobility issues. I'm often dizzy, off balance, not steady on my feet. I understand that I don't "look" disabled but the fact is that I actually am.

It's why I get a disability check. This is actually something I can't "work on".

When reading comments like DO NOT SIT!, Sat Down...Really?, and other directed comments about sitting, when sitting is not a choice I get to make, knowing points were deducted from a disability, that's unacceptable.

Please stop assuming that if someone is sitting they are being lazy, disrespectful or rude. They probably are not. They probably have a valid reason for needing that.

I fell down the stairs at the venue because I got dizzy and lost my footing the first day and again outside just trying to stand for a photo. By the end of the event I had to be walked to the stage by two people in the class. They literally held me up that last walk because my legs were simply not working. Coordination wasn't happening.

I had to sit for the final presentation before the announcement because I wasn't able to stand up. Somedays are good days and I don't have the vertigo and dizzy spells and do good, other times not so great. It comes and goes with the KLS cycles. It's just something I have to live with and work around.

And YES I sat for my education because I Needed to. Not because I wanted to.

I did NOT expect that to count against my points. I did not expect to see the first comments from judges to be the direction DO NOT SIT!

People please remember that not everyone has a visible disability. PLEASE remember that when you are scoring contestants and they are sitting, that is probably a necessity.

Know that I do not want to take up minutes of our limited time explaining why I am sitting. That discussion of why is feeling like I am Justifying why I need to. And that should Never happen.

I'm fine with constructive criticism on things I need to work on, improve so I can present better, but a physical disability is something I can't change.

Seeing this repeatedly pointed out by multiple judges commenting negatively on my disability really concerns me and should concern anyone.

I do not use a wheelchair, I am trying to continue to walk as long as I can and while that might be an easier choice it isn't a choice I am ready to make just yet.

I choose to not bring my mobility support animal to an extremely small and overcrowded venue simply because a great Dane is needed for proper mobility support for my height and weight and Bear is a Huge dog and while he is trained for this, the space limitations do not make this realistic. So I had a full team on hand to make sure I had the physical help necessary but they can't be on stage with me.

I tried to get through the competition without drawing attention to the fact that I have a physical limitation because I do not want that to be the focus.

Sadly it hurt me in scoring. They didn't ask or enquire they just scored me negatively for sitting.

I am not okay with that. And I needed to address this because this should not be happening at all, to anyone.

This should not be the experience.

If you are a judge for any leather competition, please please keep my words in mind. Please take this to heart and please stop thinking all disability is visible automatically because it is not factual. Do better guys. You are the leaders and you're judging us on how we carry ourselves and setting standards and today after seeing the books, today I'm judging you.

Do better.

We have another performer to announce! Helix Rider will be performing at Show Me Leather 2024!

Helix Rider is a trans drag king, community advocate, proud Little, and s*x educator. He reigned as Duke of KC Pride 2023 and used that opportunity to teach "Trans 101" through Squishy and Scrappy Presents. Helix lives by the belief that there's no wrong way to be you.

So make sure that you have plenty of ones to show the love for these awesome performers we have this year!