Shift with Sydney

When I graduated from college, I couldn’t wait to not be a student anymore. I had a feeling I’d go back to school at some point, but I had no idea what I’d study and I so badly wanted to be an adult with a normal 9-5 and weekends off (idk what I was thinking either lol).

It was probably about 9 months after Tyler died, when I whispered to my therapist that I might want to be a therapist, too. It felt so far fetched that I could hardly say it out loud. At the time, I felt too sad and too foggy to believe I’d ever be capable of going back to school to actually become a therapist. Fortunately though, I was encouraged to take baby steps. So I started diving into the life coaching route, and I continue to be blown away by the beautiful and organic evolution this path has created.

With every coaching session, I’ve witnessed the impact that simply holding space for others can have. To feel seen and understood, with no judgment or expectation, is such a gift. One I’m eternally grateful to have received in my darkest times and I can’t think of any other way I want to spend my time and energy than to pay it forward and offer that to those who need it. I feel more inspired every day to continue leaning into the mental health profession and I’m so excited to be where I am today - less than a week from the start of the Masters of Social Work program at Salisbury University! I’m really doing it.

If I could, I’d travel in time to tell that sad and foggy girl that she’ll not only be okay, but that her healing journey will be one of more growth than she thinks possible. And I’d give her a big hug because she fought for me - today’s version of me. And I’m really, really proud of her.

It has been 2 years since you were on this Earth. 2 whole years. I can hardly believe it. Nothing is the same. Literally everything has changed, morphed, grown. Including me and my love for you. Sometimes I hate that. Sometimes I want to sprint back to our old versions and soak up their comfort, bask in their naïveté. And sometimes, I’m absolutely breathless with gratitude for how me and my love for you have grown, through it all. The depth of trust that’s come from this journey is almost as unbelievable as you being gone. I trust myself more than I ever have because I trust you as my guardian angel. It’s such a complicated thing, but it’s also so beautiful. I know you are constantly with me - loving, guiding, and protecting. And I continue to thank you for it. Forever & always ♥️

I know you’d want me to use this day as a celebration of your life, and an opportunity to remind people to love fiercely, to forgive - themselves and others, release judgments, and practice gratitude. So that’s exactly what I’ll do. And eat Tollhouse cookies, of course.

Time for a lil life update!

With all that has transpired and manifested since the beginning of this year, I feel this is almost a reintroduction. I shared the longer story in my newsletter today, so if you're curious to know the backstory, check your inbox (or subscribe here https://buff.ly/3ErgNWx and I'll send it to you). But long story short...

I decided to go back to school! I'm starting the Masters of Social Work program at Salisbury University this fall! I'm so excited to lean more into the world of mental health and trauma recovery as my own healing journey and how I can support others evolves!

Part of the exploration of that decision also opened a door to an amazing opportunity to be the office manager/event coordinator at HealTree - a holistic mental health practice here in Lewes. Not only do I get to learn and grow within this awesome whole-person healing environment, but I also get to see my own coaching clients there!

Everything unfolding is nothing less than a match made in heaven, and that tracks! 😉 But none of this would be possible without my willingness to sit in stillness, listen to what was meant for me, and allow myself to pursue it.

So that's the message I'm keeping in mind and what I want to share with you - listen for your truth and follow it! 😘