Hercules Gym

NEW TOY - Icarian Standing Calf - Do you wear pants to the gym in the summertime? Have you ever complained that calf size is all genetics? Or told yourself that if you were just a bit fatter, you too might have calves like upside-down bowling pins? If so, you may be suffering from a debilitating psychological condition called Small Calf Syndrome (SCS, for short). SCS sufferers often feel hopeless. Like they've been forced to carry this immense mental burden atop two toothpick-like legs that clearly were not designed to shoulder such a weighty load. Well, SCS friends, rejoice! There is finally hope: the Icarian Angled Calf. It's the most iconic calf machine in the long, storied history of gym equipment. It can whip the most stubborn and uncooperative lower legs into shape - genetics be damned! Perhaps this summer you'll finally experience the overwhelming joy of having golden sunlight radiating off your freshly bare legs. And as the warm breeze whooshes past your shapely calves, you'll look to the sky with a newfound contentment and feel lucky (perhaps for the first time) to be alive.

NEW TOY - Body Master Pec Dec - Do you like naked old guys? If so, DON'T come to Hercules. Yes, saunas are great recovery tools. But they also attract naked old guys like fly to stink. There are some things that are best done behind closed doors, or in the privacy of one's own home. And we believe that sauna is one of those activities. That's why we'll never have one. If I sound overly harsh, it's because a lot of my childhood was spent in just such a locker room. My family owned a gym and the men's locker room had dry sauna, steam sauna, communal showers, the whole nine. Let me just say, I didn't look forward to crossing that threshold and entering the land of pasty bare skin, wrinkles, and hair in all the wrong places. I've spent many years repressing those memories. And now that I'm in charge, I'll be damned if I'm the one afflicting that scene on our untainted youth. Sorry for the rant. I just felt like I had to share my truth. Thank you for listening...And screw saunas.

NEW TOY - Flex Dorsiflexor Row - How does Hercules improve and evolve as a gym? We follow a Darwinian “survival of the fittest” approach to equipment (there’s a method to the madness). We bring in a machine we think is dope, put it on the floor, and watch how members use it. If it’s love at first sight, it earns a permanent spot. If the response is lukewarm, then it’s on the chopping block. As new, good-looking machines arrive, the old duds rotate into storage and the young bucks step up for observation. If they perform, they stay. If not, the experiment begins anew.

It’s a nonstop cycle of natural selection driven by what our members actually love — and that’s how Hercules gets stronger and better over time.