MyBarMitzvahLessons.com

Many years ago, I decided to devote my life to teaching students with special needs.Three years ago, when I left Toronto to live in the United States with my newly wed wife, despite all of my best efforts through ads in local newspapers and from my website mybarmitzvahlessons.com no one wanted to learn on-line because everyone preferred an in person teacher to one over the internet.

My dream to teach students with special needs from all over the world was shelved for an era when the paradigm shift would occur when learning by computer would be accepted or even preferred to in person learning..

Perhaps, just maybe, that day has come.

Last month, as fate would have it, on April 1, 2020 (coinciding with my Hebrew birth date of the 7th of Nissan), I was furloughed from my day job.

With a 4 month old new born daughter and a 4 year old son, I now need a way to support my family.

What am I going to do?

I feel in my heart of hearts that the time has come for on-line teaching for special needs students.

The schools, universities and daycare programs all teach remotely. It can be done. It is being done.

I am turning to the world, to my former students and their parents, to my friends and to my Facebook family, if you know of someone who wants to learn Hebrew, to read from the Torah or how to lead prayer services, please send them my way for a complimentary 30 minute introductory lesson and Hebrew reading/Bar Mitzvah lessons.

I leave it to their parents to then make an informed decision if this is the way for their child to connect to their heritage and to their own inner strength. I am here to help guide them in this life long goal.

For adults who never had a Bar Mitzvah, I turn to you and extend my helping hand to make your dream a reality. It is never too late. The story of my brother Aaron Cohen, of fond memory, proves that.

Thank you in advance for all of your help.

Wishing all of you much happiness, health and hope.

Love,
Marcel

https://www.thejewishnews.com/2016/07/22/tutors-motto-every-child-can-bar-bat-mitzvah/

Tutor’s Motto Is ‘Every Child Can Have A Bar Or Bat Mitzvah’ - Detroit Jewish News One of the most iconic celebrations in Judaism is the bar or bat mitzvah, where a youngster takes on the responsibilities of adulthood and proclaims before an audience of family and friends that he or she is ready to become a functioning member of the greater community within the Jewish faith. As a…

Life is Not Fair
Some students whom I teach are gifted in music, have perfect pitch, can read Hebrew fluently, are smart, catch on quickly, understand the underlying "trope" (musical cantillation) of the Torah and Haftorah and quickly master their portion.

Other students struggle and every musical note eludes them - even the same Hebrew vowels we just reviewed escapes their brain the next time we stumble on it - thereby they are gaining absolutely no traction whatsoever on any of the "trope" or any of the Hebrew letters/vowels we read on previous lines. It seems like they will NEVER grasp their portion - no matter how small it might be.

For this latter group of students, life, in general, and their Bar/Bat Mitzvah lessons, in particular, is really tough.

That is not fair. It isn't.

Sorry. I can't tell a lie. It makes me sad and always has.

So what should I do with such students?

Well, I feel it is our responsibility to set all students up for success. (This is no easy task for a child to whom every word and musical note is a struggle.)

How can this "success" be accomplished?

I think the number one ingredient is NOT TO GIVE UP ON THEM EVER!

If you do, they will for sure!

Case in point: I periodically receive phone calls or e-mails from parents who are in a panic because they already went to another Bar or Bat Mitzvah tutor and after a number of months, the teacher gave up on their child. They find my number from word of mouth or from my website since I specialize in special needs and learning disabilities for Bar/Bat Mitzvah. I am the last resort for their child.

Perhaps the reason the other tutor gave up on them was a combination of frustration, impatience and anger at the student who did not grasp the same rote teaching that worked for many of their other students beforehand.

In every case I received, I had to analyze the source of the student's impasse and most importantly, I had to build them up emotionally in order to empower them to succeed.

Does it work? Um.... yes... and HOW!

It says in Pirkei Avot (Ethics of our Fathers), "A shy person does not learn and a strict person cannot teach."

Here is how I interpret that verse: a shy person is embarrassed to ask for help when they are struggling to understand - so they never get past the point where they stopped understanding the teacher. A strict teacher, makes a regular student and especially an already shy student into a very shy person who is afraid to ask for help when they are lost.

Therefore, the way to teach a struggling Bar or Bat Mitzvah student is to empower them to understand their own struggles so they can think of ways to overcome them - together with you.

By doing this they learn an invaluable skill - that they do not have to grind to a halt and feel hopeless when they do not understand something. They can ask for help.

Another thing they can do is to think of why can't they sing that note - is it higher or lower than what they just produced? How does that feel in their throat when they sing it correctly? Can they reproduce that same sound? If they try again and again with constant encouragement every single step of the way, miracles start to be revealed to them.

The miracle is: them.

They are the miracle. They are making their own dreams come true. They are not "stupid". They can figure things out. Just like the "other smart students" who always seem to "get it". Now they are the smart student that "gets it". Finally!!!

That is the miracle. That is where life becomes a little fairer.

In the end, for the struggling student, this will be the greatest gift they will get for their Bar/Bat Mitzvah. They gift of feeling they can overcome difficulties and achieve greatness - but ONLY when they are patiently shown the way.

All the best to all of you who read my posts.

I hope it helps you or people you know and care about.

With love,
Marcel